Incomplete Disposal (John Dotson’s dream of September 20, 2010)
I am aware that drastic things have happened; indeed there are bodies to be disposed of. I am not directly involved but I am aware. In a room, a large room in an upper story of a building in a large city, I am aware that three bodies in shrouds have been placed head to toe in the wide ledge of a wide window. I am aware that those around me have made these arrangements and that there are materials around the ledge that are combustible and I observe that these materials have been set on fire.
Somehow–despite my anxieties–I know the fire will burn and the smoke will exit the window efficiently. I turn away from the scene, however. It is too much to observe. After some further activities with these anonymous others who are actually creating the scene, I turn back-warily and skeptically–to observe that the three bodies have been completely burned to ashes–completely and thoroughly. In fact, the ashes are miraculously swept out the window leaving the ledge empty, though I am certain that there is residue, even at the microscopic scale.
I am very concerned that this “solution” is not a perfect solution among these people who are directly involved and though I am not, I also know that I am indirectly involved–and thus involved. The slate has not been burned clean. I am further aware that these three male figures that have been burned are allegorical aspects of myself. I feel a certain dispassionate horror in the incompleteness of the disposition of things